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Thread: Leaving for good
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11th June 2014 #1
Leaving for good
JUST A THOUGHT, NOTHING HAPPENING JUST YET.
Right, you think the time has come to say thats it we are off, lots say that you must not cut all ties just in case it does not work out, but what ties are you on about?
Do you mean dont sell the house because you will have somewhere to live if you come back, but what happens if you rent, what other ties are you saying you must not cut?
The Health Service, I understand that many say is a godsend and its free too so be careful because if you leave you cannot get back in. Who knows what will happen there. But I am sure it will not make any difference to some, if and when they say I am off. So what other ties are there that you should not cut?
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12th June 2014 #2
As you know Steve,we cut our UK ties when I was 44 years old...
The ties we did not cut away from were my family ties in the UK.. We are in contact with them all the time and we have had 6 visits from them.. My mother came over for 4 months and although she is 72 years old,she did not want to leave!!..
In 2 months time we will be digging the foundations for her new house and now my sister is asking us to help her build hers!
I have friends arriving today and some more in July..
I can honestly say that it was our work commitments that prevented us seeing more of them in the U.K.
No regrets..
On the contrary..cutting our U.K "ties" was the best thing we ever did.
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12th June 2014 #3
Thanks Fred, with the internet I know when we make the move I shall see more of my family than I do at this moment in time. And maybe some will come over once we are settled.
But thats down to them,
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12th June 2014 #4
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It's an interesting question Steve...........and one which most folks battle with.
I've worked and lived in many different countries and 'the ties' that chiefly bother people the most seem to be missing friends and family.
It always seemed to me that those who found they couldn't settle well, usually lived close to their friends and family in UK and had pretty tight bonds. Moving away from that circle of ties could come as a real shock and was often too much to bear.
Especially as parents or other family members got older or suffer poor health.
In fact I eventually returned from Japan for that very reason of elderly parents with failing health
Getting to grips with a completely new culture and language issues can lead to a perceived, and sometimes strong, loss of a sense of belonging. Those 'intangible' missed little things. A yearning for the familiar. A feeling of always being the outsider looking in. Little things can mean lot.
Food, the weather etc.
Sounds funny in a way, but it's these little things that can grow in the doubtful mind.
I think what I'm getting at Steve is that there are no ties to be cut. Those ties can never be cut. Either you can manage them or you can't.
Some folks just can't.
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12th June 2014 #5
When I leave these Isles there will not be much I will miss. We have a plan and it is quite a few years before we go.
Fish and Chips at the seaside.
The lack of traffic on the road compared to the Philippines.
Chicken with no bones in it.
Any family that want to see me will be very welcome but I cannot see many coming. I only see my grown up children when they want money. My mother is in her 70s, so will be in her 80s when we go - if she is still here.
I spend all my time with my wife if I am not at work. We love each other's company. As long as the aircon is working I will not miss a thing really.
What I really miss is being over there. I can live with the ants, mosquitos, heat and chicken with bones sticking out of it in all directions as long as i have my wife with me.
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12th June 2014 #6
When I made the decision to move here, there was always the chatterbox in my head. Am I doing the right thing? Especially that I would sell my house, leave and sell off many of my tools, belongings etc.
But I made the decision on that I had nothing to lose, I wasn't happy with my life in UK.
I believe we have to live the way and where we want to be. We can't stay in one place just because we feel we will leave everything and people we know behind, it's our life and we should do what we feel is right for us.
Won't be long before I will have been here a year, and I have no regrets.
Yes, there are things I miss, like friends, family, the food, pastry, steak pies, bread, Indian curry.
But I'm living the life I want to live, and it outweighs all I miss.
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12th June 2014 #7
I don't miss my old life in the Uk one little bit. Some, like Peter said, can't hack it and will sometimes give silly reasons for not making it. For me, all I have in the Uk that I really care about are my parents. But they understand why I have made the Philippines my home and wish me well in my life there, specially now that they have visited us three times already and know the lifestyle that we live. They are happy that we Skype every week or more if needed, they see the children running around and playing and see both Charie and me are happy and in love.
I miss Marmite (well Tesco Marmite/Yeast Extract)
As for leaving but still thinking about ties, I still pay my national insurance to keep up my pension and NHS cover. I also keep a utility bill running for my parents' internet just so I have ID and a Uk address if necessary.If you want your dreams to come true ...... first you have to wake up
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12th June 2014 #8
Great thread Steve
This has to be the million pound question for a lot of members on here.
Do we scrimp and save here to eventually retire in the Philippines?
Do we cut all ties with the UK?.......... Easier for me as I have a very small family, but lots of friends I would miss.
When do we retire 40,50,60,70? The longer we leave it the shorter time we have left to enjoy ourselves and reap the rewards of the hard work we've done here to be able to afford to up sticks.
How much do we need?............ This is my major question as I like my creature comforts (take that as I'm not from Yorkshire )
Then we get onto questions like healthcare etc
Fred, I'd love to hear more of your exploits. I didn't realise you moved at 44, I'll be 47 this year and am thinking of moving within the next 5 years.
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12th June 2014 #9
Everyone's situations are different Simon. I am only 48 and moved away from the Uk. Slightly different for me as I am an expat and working in China and return to Phils to my home and family between contracts. I have not been back to the Uk for 21/2 years (ok short time) but don't intend to either.
I have no home in the Uk anymore so stay in Phils on a tourist visa which is easily extended or on a balikbayan stamp. Lots of options.If you want your dreams to come true ...... first you have to wake up
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12th June 2014 #10
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12th June 2014 #11
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12th June 2014 #12
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12th June 2014 #13
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I said goodbye to the UK 'for good' in 1990, 1994, and 2000.
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12th June 2014 #14
Wow, what a response. Lots of very good reading from everyone so far. Thanks guys for some great answers
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12th June 2014 #15
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12th June 2014 #16
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12th June 2014 #17
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12th June 2014 #18
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12th June 2014 #19
Thanks Simon ,
Lots of questions there too. Well, to answer a few from me
Saving very hard but still enjoying life here
A very very large family but they all know my plans,
As soon as I think I have enough cash but no later then the age of 60, no matter what
Healthcare. Well a mine field for many, but for me, anything other then major things I shall just have to have enough to pay for things. Surely with the sun on my face, warmth through my bones and the right food and love I may be more healthy, but who knows. But it will not stop me living the dream
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12th June 2014 #20
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13th June 2014 #21
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13th June 2014 #22
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13th June 2014 #23
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13th June 2014 #24
Yes Stewart, the flour in the supermarkets out there is spot on for making Yorkshire Pudding. I used olive oil in the baking tin and they were really nice. One of the first things we bought was a gas cooker and it was great, used it almost every day even just to heat the plates for my bacon and egg breakfast!
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13th June 2014 #25
Good to read all the success stories and I admire anyone that has made the move - for me it's a big and brave decision.
I think I'd keep the house here and have the Health Service just in case. But so many questions keep popping up - when to go, where to go, finances, build or rent, etc.
I have been contemplating the idea for the past couple of years but half of me wants to, the other half does not.
The wife, of course she would like to, but she would leave the final decision to me I think .
I do not know if I would be able to stand the heat though, it would take a bit of getting used to I imagine.
Anyway that's my take on itM&M
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14th June 2014 #26
My biggest reason for not staying in Philippines was NHS there were other reasons for coming back to UK but I could tolerate those, if I was twenty years younger I would like to live there. Needs a lot of thought but good luck with whatever your decision is Mike!
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14th June 2014 #27
I left home and the area i grew up in at 16, so i got used to being away from family members at an early age. It used to be months sometimes years between me speaking to my siblings, even though we get on great. More recently due to advances in technology we tend to speak more often or at least know what each other is doing with their life's.
I agree with Steve R that you should keep a utility bill up and running. Trying to do certain things without them isn't always an easy task.
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14th June 2014 #28
There are a lot of new threads in that post Simon
We came to live in the Philippines when i was 31. I have never regretted that decision even though the first few years were difficult financially.
The cost of living in the Philippines does vary with the type of lifestyle you want. If you like your creature comforts, have kids in school or college and take medication it isn't going to be any cheaper than the UK.
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14th June 2014 #29
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14th June 2014 #30
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