Aussie Welfare

[KeithD]

Time for a bit of a laugh on here today.

Sentences taken from actual applicants' letters received by local Welfare Departments in Australia.

1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I have 7, but one was baptized on half a sheet of paper.
2. I am writing the Welfare Department to say that my baby was born 2 years old. When do I get my money?
3. Mrs. Jones has not had any clothes for a year and has been visited by the clergy regularly.
4. I cannot get sick pay. I have 6 children. Can you tell me why?
5. I am glad to report that my husband who was missing is dead.
6. This is my 8th child. What are you going to do about it?
7. Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I now live with can't eat or do anything until he knows.
8. I am very much annoyed to find that you have branded my son as illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married a week before he was born.
9. In answer to your letter, I have given birth to a boy weighing 10 pounds. I hope this is satisfactory.
10. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 3 children, one of which is a mistake as you can see.
11. My husband got his project cut off 2 weeks ago and I haven't had any relief since.
12. Unless I get my husband's money pretty soon, I will be forced to lead an immortal life.
13. You have changed my little boy to a girl. Will this make any difference?
14. I have no children yet as my husband is a truck driver and works day and night.
15. In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.
16. I want my money as quick as I can get it. I've been in bed with the doctor for 2 weeks and he doesn't do me any good. If things don't improve, I will have to send for another doctor.

[andypaul]

I like those made me

[ervenescence]

ROFLMAO

[aromulus]

Yeah................ Keep 'em coming boss....

[kimmi]

this is really great for a good laugh!!!

[h0ney_c]