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6th February 2014 #1
who here is in a long distance relationship?
hey gang,
would just like to know if there are many out there in a long distance relationship?
If so, just add some comments as follows:
how long you are apart
how you guys get by
how you are finding it
how often ye talk
what methods of communication ye use
when you get to meet your partner again
here's my story
I said goodbye to my love in September last year
She is currently studying for IELTS and looking to re-apply as a nurse
We speak many times throughout the day, luckily she has mobile data, and tethers her internet to her laptop whenever we need to use a proper laptop based cam.
We use the following modes of communication(in order of use):
whatsapp (65%)
viber (15%)
viber desktop (video function mainly used here) (10)
facebook messenger (5%)
skype (5%)
I go over in April to see her
I'm finding it OK, our time apart has confirmed to be we are to be, I miss and love her more today than ever before..
ed
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6th February 2014 #2
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
- Location
- south of england
- Posts
- 557
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- 0
me
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6th February 2014 #3
A lot of us were in a LDR in the past!
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6th February 2014 #4
Was once but not now
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6th February 2014 #5
- Join Date
- Jul 2005
- Location
- Pangasinan
- Posts
- 25,597
- Rep Power
- 150
Me....2 years now. Just had my second holiday in the Phils with my lady.
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6th February 2014 #6
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6th February 2014 #7
- Join Date
- Jul 2005
- Location
- Pangasinan
- Posts
- 25,597
- Rep Power
- 150
Not rushing into anything is my plan.
I'm hoping to retire there, but a bit early yet.
Mercedes won't be coming here to this miserable place.
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7th February 2014 #8
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8th February 2014 #9
- Join Date
- Jul 2005
- Location
- Pangasinan
- Posts
- 25,597
- Rep Power
- 150
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9th February 2014 #10
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- Southern England
- Posts
- 5,102
- Rep Power
- 0
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7th February 2014 #11
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6th February 2014 #12
- Join Date
- Aug 2010
- Location
- Marikina City
- Posts
- 26,785
- Rep Power
- 150
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7th February 2014 #13
Me.
I'm just finished my second visit to Cebu.
Just officially engaged now.
It's hard but we know it's what we want.
We talk everyday on Skype/Google Talk/WhatsApp.
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7th February 2014 #14
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
- Location
- London
- Posts
- 1,524
- Rep Power
- 110
I am still tying to find that special woman
I am in no rush and I have a strict criteria that must be met.
Gold diggers and freelancers are weeded out at an early stage
Hissy fits and temper tantrums are not tolerated
I am willing to support my Girlfriend but i am not so keen on supporting the extended family back in the province
I make that clear from day 1 diba
Yahoo Messenger and Viber
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9th February 2014 #15
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- Southern England
- Posts
- 5,102
- Rep Power
- 0
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7th February 2014 #16
I was up until 3 & half years ago but thankfully my wife joined me here in the uk in 2010
I certainly wouldn't like to be going through the visa process now
AN HAPPY WIFE IS A HAPPY LIFE
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8th February 2014 #17
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7th February 2014 #18
Yes have been for almost 2 years.
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7th February 2014 #19
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
- Location
- south of england
- Posts
- 557
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- 0
I am willing to support my Girlfriend but i am not so keen on supporting the extended family back in the province
hmmm funny you should say that.
i first met mine here in the uk about 28 months ago--she was on a student visa. flew home in aug 2012. somehow managed to get a visit visa --came back here in july 2013: returned to filis a month ago.
much water--& Ł under the bridge in that time.
obviously she wasnt allowed to work during her stay with me--so guess who supported her kids back home. i think the words "thin end " and "wedge" come to mind.
communication is scant--no internet where she lives--and not into endless text chatter or expensive phone calls.
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7th February 2014 #20
like many have siad before me, most of us started the same way as you,
If i was to go through it all again i would not bother about bringing her here but would rather save hard for me to go there
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7th February 2014 #21
wow, i thought I was the only one!
interesting to hear the different experience, comments and advice given by everyone.
but the one i dont understand is where there is a LDR still taking place - even after the marriage, can someone please explain this situation.
thanks
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7th February 2014 #22
The way I see is that even after marriage your loved one simply can't jump on a plane and join you no no.
You have to go through the tortuous process of the visa application.
I married my wife in July 2012 and after different countries we decided to settle in I brought her to the UK after a lot of help from my good friends on here.
It was finally in the December I brought my beloved wife here and 34 weeks pregnant to boot so yes another one here been in a LDR, god would I go through the stress again if I could go back in time mmm.......
With this lady I am with now a definite YES...
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7th February 2014 #23
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
- Location
- south of england
- Posts
- 557
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- 0
that only works if they DONT want to settle in this country
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7th February 2014 #24
plus the cost of trying to get your partner here with you, just because you fall in love with that special person and marry her, sometimes you just cannot afford to bring them here, hard yes and i have no idea how some people manage to do that
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7th February 2014 #25
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
- Location
- south of england
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- 557
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- 0
i sold my house to free up the capital. only way possible.
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7th February 2014 #26
end of the day, its all worth it, thats what i say
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9th February 2014 #27
Read this thread and made me interested in answering this!
Been in a long distance relationship for almost a year now, he went here twice (May and November 2013). He went back to his mum last Feb 2013 so he can rent out his aparment for a year because it was the easiest way to save for his trips here. Now he cannot go here anymore as he just went back to his apartment so it is quite impossible for him to save.
My first visa (marriage visit visa) was denied and currently collating documents for fiancee visa because now, we are just relying (visa expenses) to what he have saved for a year. If this fiancee visa will be denied, we have no choice but I guess to end our relationship :( The first denied visa was quite depressing how much more with the second one which is really expensive and stressful :( and we will no longer have any way to save more for visa application again, it is like do or die now. Hahaha
Since the day we met until now, we never miss a day not talking to each other even if we are at work. Whatsapp, Viber, Skype, Facebook, Twitter. I am really thankful that these apps are very useful!
Long distance relationship must have a goal so both of you have something to look forward to, I swear you won't notice the time. :
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9th February 2014 #28
- Join Date
- Jul 2005
- Location
- Pangasinan
- Posts
- 25,597
- Rep Power
- 150
Well here's my take on LDRs...for what it's worth.
If a man is motivated enough and genuinely puts his relationship with his chosen lady before all else, then he can and will move mountains to 'make it happen'.
Then there are the 'daydreamers' (on both sides).
If either or both partners are not prepared to be flexible, and willing to make certain sacrifices, then I'm afraid the relationship is likely to fail.
A LDR is different, and things can't be expected to work like clockwork, according to some perfect plan. Usually a real EFFORT has to be made, and reality faced.
Over the past 24 years I have lost track of how many times I've bought and sold houses, put my possessions into store, changed my job, moved countries, come home with nowhere to stay except some cheap hostel or a friend's spare room...all in the interests of maintaining a LDR or a marriage.
Many many good times and a few bad, but never a dull moment. Living life, taking a few risks.
LDRs are not for 'normal' people. They are for couples who are genuinely in love, and who are prepared to go the extra mile to be together.
Daydreamers...forget it, and move along before someone gets hurt.
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12th February 2014 #29
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12th February 2014 #30
- Join Date
- Jul 2005
- Location
- Pangasinan
- Posts
- 25,597
- Rep Power
- 150
Thanks !
Sometimes I wish I'd take my own advice.
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