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  1. #1
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    I love my lady :-)

    Hi Everyone,

    I am glad to be a part of your community, it looks like you are a friendly bunch and hopefully you can provide a little advice to me.

    My Filipina girlfriend and I have been together for 2 months and are madly in love. I have never married and always waited for the right girl and she is certainly the person I wish to spend the rest of my life with and the feeling is mutual.

    I am 40, living in Cardiff and my Filipina girlfriend is 27 and lives in Weston Super Mare. About 3 miles across the water, (but no ferry available haha) 50 miles by car.

    I have a house and business in Cardiff and my girlfriend is working in nursing care in Weston. She came to the UK 2 1/2 years ago to study and then as part of that a health care role. Her visa expires early February 2014.

    Her work have said they would love her to stay and would continue her employment. However, for them to sponsor her, apparently she needs to pass one more exam, but this will mean enrolling for a further 6 months course, (perhaps Bristol University). However, if she enrols in a new course to complete the extra qualification required, it will take her past the February visa expiration date.

    My girlfriend is worried and seems to think, that because she had an extension already, the UK immigration will not grant another. I am not quite sure where she has got this information from, probably confused and mixed messages read online etc.

    Even though at present we live in different places, we do very much want to live together. It's just a bit tricky at the moment with her work being in Weston and my business being in Cardiff.

    Also I would love to marry her and will be getting engaged in the near future, but I don't want to do this just for 'paper work'. Marriage really should be at the right time. However, I guess if we get married here in the UK, it could help our situation? If that then meant she could move into my house and look for similar work in Cardiff, then that would be amazing, but I am guessing nothing is as straight forward as that?

    So I am wondering what might be the best thing to do. Should she try and get an extension on her Visa focused on her work wanting to keep her position going and leave me out of the application / type of visa or should we be getting married and doing things jointly as a couple?

    To be honest, I will do whatever it takes for us to continue our relationship and hopefully it will be long lasting and forever. Even in the worse case where my girlfriend is not granted an extension or cannot stay, then I will sell my shares in the business and move to Manila with her in February. Luckily I have another business interest which I can manage from my laptop anywhere in the world.

    Sorry for the length of my post, but I guess the more information I can provide the better.

    All the best, Jim :-)


  2. #2
    Trusted Member stevewool's Avatar
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    aint it great to be in love, but 2 months is a short time just take it slow


  3. #3
    Respected Member imagine's Avatar
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    welcome to the forum

    i agree with steve 2 months is not long, and im kind of thinking well can you be sure the situation is genuine and its not just because the visa is about to run out, are you sure its not just for the sake of finding a way to stay,

    don't just rely on your heart alone use you head too,
    all im saying is be carefull and sure,
    you will know better than anybody if its genuine, but sometimes we get fooled,


  4. #4
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    Hi guys, thanks for the reply. I completely know where you are coming from. However, I have dated my fair share of women over time, some long term, some short term, but never quite found 'the one'. This time, there is a connection, a big time connection where we just get on so well, have a laugh, are hugely respectful to each other, attracted to each other in many ways and there is just something I haven't felt before, its all a bit crazy! So I am thinking, go for it! (and usually I have a very sensible head). I would rather take the plunge and make a mistake I learn from, than always wonder what could have been... :-)

    So if anyone has any Visa advice based on my initial post, that would be great. Thanks.


  5. #5
    Trusted Member sars_notd_virus's Avatar
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    Welcome to the forum Jim!!

    It is common in this country to live together before taking a trip down the aisle , it'll give you time to know each other a bit more.
    ''Don't be serious..Be Sincere''


  6. #6
    Respected Member imagine's Avatar
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    i wish you both the best of luck and happy future

    i can't give you the visa advice myself, i don't know enough, however there are members here who are much more knowledgeable than myself, i am sure they will provide some help once they read your thread


  7. #7
    Respected Member Slip's Avatar
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    I disagree that 2 months is too short.... I am closing in on 40 years of age and have never been so sure about any woman as I am now.

    I proposed to her about two months after meeting her and now almost a year later we are going strong and planning our marriage next June/July time.

    A year ago I would have most definitely have said two months is too short a time.... But I now believe in love at first sight.
    The saying goes that there is someone fore everyone out there.... I believe I found mine, I hope yours turns out to be the one too.


  8. #8
    Respected Member imagine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slip View Post
    I disagree that 2 months is too short.... I am closing in on 40 years of age and have never been so sure about any woman as I am now.

    I proposed to her about two months after meeting her and now almost a year later we are going strong and planning our marriage next June/July time.

    A year ago I would have most definitely have said two months is too short a time.... But I now believe in love at first sight.
    The saying goes that there is someone fore everyone out there.... I believe I found mine, I hope yours turns out to be the one too.
    everyone has different experiences a lot can happen in 2 months, too short might be the case for some but ample time for others


  9. #9
    Trusted Member sars_notd_virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jimps1973 View Post

    I have a house and business in Cardiff and my girlfriend is working in nursing care in Weston. She came to the UK 2 1/2 years ago to study and then as part of that a health care role. Her visa expires early February 2014.

    So if anyone has any Visa advice based on my initial post, that would be great. Thanks.
    you mean , you are both living apart then get married ??

    The UKBA is very particular with cohabitation..if both of you decide to get married you have to live together , then she can apply for flr before her other visa to stay in the uk expires...and whilst waiting for the flr visa and the BRP she is not allowed to accept any jobs.
    ''Don't be serious..Be Sincere''


  10. #10
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    Hi, thanks for the positive comments guys.

    Yes we are not living together at present, however that is about to change. I was informed by UK Immigration today, that we should apply to get married, then after 15 days it is possible to get married. So before the end of the year would be a good time. Then once married, she can actually continue to work under the conditions of her present Post Study Work Visa if she wishes. Although that might not be so easy, as her position is in Weston and my house is in Cardiff, but luckily I can sustain us both and I surpass the financial requirement. Once married she can apply using the FLRM form, with my assistance. As my wife with the relevant Visa, she would be allowed to find work if she wished, which is great as it's only fair that she can still have her own life.


  11. #11
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    Good Luck Jimps


  12. #12
    Respected Member bhem_bhem's Avatar
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    i want to help but i don't know the new rules now. i used to be a student and was planning of extending my visa but obviously ur gf's situation is different as she has already extend hers.

    when i tried applying for an extension, i found out that i can only extend if i enrol nqf level 6 in health and social care (this was early 2012). i am qualified but i find it too expensive. i didn't push through as i am only allowed to work 10 hours per week and must live in london coz my previous school is closed due to that clamping down of schools.

    relationship doesn't base on how long u know each other. if it feels right then go for it. i met my husband a month before my visa expires. we're only in a relationship for 2 weeks when i left home.. believe me within 2 weeks of my stay in philippines, we already started gathering documents for my fiancee visa. yup, we both jump head first but we didn't regret it. we've had few downs but we are happily married.

    whatever you decided, i wish you the best..
    ''The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence but there still gonna be on it''


  13. #13
    Respected Member Michael Parnham's Avatar
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    Best of luck Jim, welcome to the forum!


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