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  1. #1
    Respected Member allyn's Avatar
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    tell me guys is it funny???

    my hubby, father inlaw and brother inlaw went out tonight for a concert then had some drink,
    me and my brother inlaw girl friend was been left behind in the flat and my mother inlaw pick them up to go to back in our flat after their concert and drink....
    everyone seemed to be having fun, they are very happy when they arrive in our flat, i guess thats because they already a bit drunk ,,,all of us were laughing from their jokes...
    but after a few minutes my father inlaw starting to hit me in the back of my head and kick me in the butt....
    every one is laugh including my husband,,,it seemed to be a joke to them so i ignore it and laugh with them. Then after a couple of minutes he hit me again twice in the back of my head and kick me in the butt,,,,
    they all laugh ,,, for me its starting to feel annoying and painful so i tried to walk away slowly ...



    do you really think their physical joke is funny?
    i try to understand that maybe they just have enough alcohol and they are drunk thats why they are doing it, but to hit me in the back of my head 3x and kick me in the
    butt 2x is not funny its quite painfull.
    I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it...


  2. #2
    Respected Member Sim11UK's Avatar
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    No it is most definately not funny ...To have a few drinks, is one thing, most of us probably do that, but if your father in-law hit you, even jokingly, is just not on.

    Talk to your husband about it, now he is sober, he may not have been totally aware of what happened...Tell him how upset you are.


  3. #3
    Respected Member Ana_may365's Avatar
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    its not right! allyn.he has no rights to do that to you.and it is not a jokeif i were you i give him a :bluegrab:.


  4. #4
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    No it is not funny at all! Even if he is my dad in law, I will kick him back.

    I never allowed anybody to hit me. Joke or not.

    I hate people hurting others physically. Especially men hurting children and women.
    And I called them evils and demons.

    If they are both men, both women, both children, fighting together, that's still fair in my eyes. But a man hurting a woman, a man hurting kids, this is unfair and they are the best coward on earth.

    I remember my injections now ouch!


  5. #5
    Respected Member South-east boy's Avatar
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    It does seem strange and I would be annoyed too especially if it was hard enough for you to feel pain. Sometimes we might do a pretend kick or smack etc, but never actually make physical contact, so it seems quite surprising. What did he say before, whilst and after doing it? I'm just wondering how it came about? Did anyone else say anything?


  6. #6
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    The best thing to do is fight humour with humour, all you needed to do was laugh, look at him, and say "Next time that happens your testicles will be kicked to the back of your throat", then wink at him .... he'd shut up and stop, while the others laughed at him
    Keith Driscoll - Administrator
    Managing Director, Win2Win Limited


  7. #7
    Member jonathan47's Avatar
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    mmmmm strange behaviour i am struggling with the context, were they saying you were dim ! and need a kick in the butt to do something...i not sure how a few drinks and hummour suddenly turn to where they think it acceptable to smack your head and kick your butt, what did the other women think, maybe when they are sober you could ask them to explain why it was funny and would it be funny if you slapped him orhis mum or a memeber of his family in that way....it may highlight to them thier behaviour but maybe not....i would start keeping a diary.... and getting some money together for an escape fund......all issues start somewhere !!!!
    regards

    jj


  8. #8
    Respected Member Tish's Avatar
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    What a horrid thing to do to a lady

    In the past, people have tried to treat me that way too, not realising that I give as good as I can get

    I find people like that uses it as a way of intimadating others, making them feel inferior or just plain oppressive behaviour

    So just like the Boss say, tell them it wasn't funny, and if they intend to do it again; then give them a :HeadButter:

    Tish


  9. #9
    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    Not funny at all,though your husband and his father obviously thought so When your back in Pinas on Vacation ask your dad to give your hubbie a few decent punches in the face as a joke and all laugh merrily,I am sure your hubby will get the message Nowt as strange as folks Just try your best to avoid them if they are drunk in future



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


  10. #10
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    Sounds like some weird private joke that only they got. Certainly not normal behaviour. As others have said talk to your hubby about it when hes sober.


  11. #11
    Respected Member somebody's Avatar
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    Err no, sounds like he has issues. I know your situation is delicate already as others say discuss why it happened maybe it is some in joke but as it hurt and you were not in on it totally out of order.

    Anyone who was sober who saw that and laughed is far more gulity in my eyes.
    Oh lord why did you make so many clothes and shoe shops


  12. #12
    Respected Member allyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    The best thing to do is fight humour with humour, all you needed to do was laugh, look at him, and say "Next time that happens your testicles will be kicked to the back of your throat", then wink at him .... he'd shut up and stop, while the others laughed at him
    hahaha,,,,boss thats a very good advice.....
    thanks!!!!
    I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it...


  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by triple5 View Post
    talk to your hubby about it when hes sober.
    That won't do anything at all.

    If he let that pass the first time around, without at least complaining to his father, he wouldn't have been worth squits the second.....

    If it had been me in his shoes I would have "glasgow kissed" dad, and chucked him out of the window....

    Don't bother waiting for an apology from that lot, dear, because there won't be one on the way.

    You have to demand one.


  14. #14
    Respected Member allyn's Avatar
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    hello!
    sim11uk, ana may, penny, south east boy,boss win2win,jonathan47,tish,tawi2,triple5,somebody and most specially aromulus for all you post....
    now im sure to my self im not over reacting with happen last night...i

    my father inlaw used to to that kind of joke to me before and most of the time i tried to just smile and laugh with them.
    I once complain about it to my husband but he said its just a joke, and if i cant get with them with those kind of joke i should not go with them...he said im over reacting about it, and that conversation turn into an argument....

    And about the insident last night, even tho the girls are sober no one tried to stop him they just laugh,,,,my mother inlaw just starting to stop him coz they have to go home coz its already late....

    hayyy life...when i woke up this morning i still feel annoyed about that rude physical joke,,,,i do want to tell it to my husband but i dont want it to turn to argument again,,,,i had enough of arguments and insulting....i think ill just shut up about it,,,,

    as long as i know from you guys that what i felt last night is right,,,thats enough for me

    thanks everyone
    I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it...


  15. #15
    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    Allyn,how old is your husband please?Dont feel its your duty to accept being the butt of physical "Jokes" your hubby sounds as if his fathers abuse of you is normal,its causing you distress,he shouldnt argue with you over it,more he should have a word with his father and tell him to tone it right down.



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


  16. #16
    Respected Member somebody's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by allyn View Post
    hello!
    sim11uk, ana may, penny, south east boy,boss win2win,jonathan47,tish,tawi2,triple5,somebody and most specially aromulus for all you post....
    now im sure to my self im not over reacting with happen last night...i

    my father inlaw used to to that kind of joke to me before and most of the time i tried to just smile and laugh with them.
    I once complain about it to my husband but he said its just a joke, and if i cant get with them with those kind of joke i should not go with them...he said im over reacting about it, and that conversation turn into an argument....

    And about the insident last night, even tho the girls are sober no one tried to stop him they just laugh,,,,my mother inlaw just starting to stop him coz they have to go home coz its already late....

    hayyy life...when i woke up this morning i still feel annoyed about that rude physical joke,,,,i do want to tell it to my husband but i dont want it to turn to argument again,,,,i had enough of arguments and insulting....i think ill just shut up about it,,,,

    as long as i know from you guys that what i felt last night is right,,,thats enough for me

    thanks everyone
    So what would happen if you started to kick your Husband or his Father. We all know they would not like it.

    If it wasn't for the risk of you getting hurt if it all went wrong I would say invite Hubby out with your friends and then start kicking him or even better one of your mates to randomly whack him.

    The people who normally think it funny dont like it dished back to them.
    Oh lord why did you make so many clothes and shoe shops


  17. #17
    Member antony73's Avatar
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    Very strange, especaily towards a lady. I think enough has been said by others memebers to assure you of this. Sort it, obviously he had something going on in his head, and not nice. Sorry you had this embarassing and wierd experiance.


  18. #18
    Respected Member allyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by somebody View Post
    So what would happen if you started to kick your Husband or his Father. We all know they would not like it.

    If it wasn't for the risk of you getting hurt if it all went wrong I would say invite Hubby out with your friends and then start kicking him or even better one of your mates to randomly whack him.

    The people who normally think it funny dont like it dished back to them.
    hehehe, i dont thnk i can kick my hubby or my father inlaw, they are 6'1 and im only 4'11,
    and my friends Like my hubby, he is a very friendly man but i think he tolerate everything his family do.

    cheers!!!
    I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it...


  19. #19
    Respected Member somebody's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by allyn View Post
    hehehe, i dont thnk i can kick my hubby or my father inlaw, they are 6'1 and im only 4'11,
    and my friends Like my hubby, he is a very friendly man but i think he tolerate everything his family do.

    cheers!!!
    They may not like your husband so much if they found that he tolerates his Wife being assault by a 6'1 man
    Oh lord why did you make so many clothes and shoe shops


  20. #20
    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    He probably is a friendly man when he is sober,but alcohol impaires people judgement of situations,tell him you dont want to argue but could he please have a word with his father and tell him he hurt you physically and mentally,your putting a brave face on to save arguing but it really did hurt you didnt it,and thats not acceptable.



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


  21. #21
    Member jonathan47's Avatar
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    maybe i am odd but i could not imagine that my father would do this and he certainly would not do it twice he would be flat on his back and out of my life, to hurt a woman is never acceptable, everyone tends to say its drink but nay i say its in his mentatliy to do it drink or no drink.....i would urge you to have a real think about you situation you are young you have all your life ahead of you if you not happy you do have choices...just promise you will not do nothing as i can see this esscalating to something worse ....it least talk with him and show him the brusies !!!! there is a culture different and sometimes it can seem like a chasm but this is not normal behavior for englishmen and anyone who has taken time and trouble to know filipina ans the philippines would know this is wrong on so many counts.

    i wish you all the best you have not said how old hubby is if hes young it might in a small way explain it hes older then shame on him...they have totally disrespected you !!!


    regards

    jj


  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tawi2 View Post
    He probably is a friendly man when he is sober,but alcohol impaires people judgement of situations,tell him you dont want to argue but could he please have a word with his father and tell him he hurt you physically and mentally,your putting a brave face on to save arguing but it really did hurt you didnt it,and thats not acceptable.
    I agree with Tawi. If this will be just ignored, then history may repeat itself.
    I told my hubby, you are bigger and taller than me, but be very careful with my small legs,
    I can kick balls.


  23. #23
    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pennybarry View Post
    I agree with Tawi. If this will be just ignored, then history may repeat itself.
    I told my hubby, you are bigger and taller than me, but be very careful with my small legs,
    I can kick balls.
    Kick balls Pen You should play for Newcastle



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


  24. #24
    Moderator Arthur Little's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by allyn View Post
    hehehe, i dont thnk i can kick my hubby or my father inlaw, they are 6'1 and im only 4'11,
    and my friends Like my hubby, he is a very friendly man but i think he tolerate everything his family do.

    cheers!!!
    Allyn, your husband may give the impression of being the 'Life & Soul of the Party' in the eyes of your friends. But the fact that a man of his stature can condone another [of similar height] - regardless of whether or not it was his dad - launching a series of physical assaults on ANY woman ... let alone one who is much smaller built - indeed his own wife ... and treat the whole thing as a is totally inexcusable. And to stand by and watch a repeat of such behaviour, amounts to nothing less than downright cowardice ... an issue that needs to be confronted at THIS stage, to (hopefully) prevent it occurring again!

    Aromulus mentioned the "Glasgow Kiss". I happen to be a Glaswegian by birth but, having moved away from that city when I was only 8 years old, I cannot claim to be familiar with its reputation for being a tough place to live. In the present context, I'd guess he was referring to the practice otherwise known as "headbutting" :HeadButter: ... whereby, the circumstances here, merited the son doing "just that" to your father-in-law, as a natural reaction to the latter striking YOU.


  25. #25
    Moderator Arthur Little's Avatar
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    Let me be clear about this: I have no objection to anyone having a drink. Like smoking, it is alright in moderation. None of us are "saints", after all!

    However, it is well-documented that there are some people for whom alcohol ... even in small quantities ... is best avoided. These are the folk whose inherent aggression almost invariably manifests itself after perhaps only a pint or two of beer ... a couple of whiskies ... or whatever.

    Believe me, I worked as a pen-pusher in the penal sector of Social Services for many years and, having direct access to confidential Background Reports on all types of offenders, it very soon became evident to me that the 'demon drink' was one of the main causes of violent :xxviolent crime.


  26. #26
    Respected Member South-east boy's Avatar
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    If they are 6ft or so and you are only 4ft 11" then there is even more of a reason why he shouldn't do that! I wonder if he would still do it if he were shorter and you were taller and of a similar build to him? I wonder if he treats his wife the same way?


  27. #27
    Respected Member LadyJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by allyn View Post
    my hubby, father inlaw and brother inlaw went out tonight for a concert then had some drink,
    me and my brother inlaw girl friend was been left behind in the flat and my mother inlaw pick them up to go to back in our flat after their concert and drink....
    everyone seemed to be having fun, they are very happy when they arrive in our flat, i guess thats because they already a bit drunk ,,,all of us were laughing from their jokes...
    but after a few minutes my father inlaw starting to hit me in the back of my head and kick me in the butt....
    every one is laugh including my husband,,,it seemed to be a joke to them so i ignore it and laugh with them. Then after a couple of minutes he hit me again twice in the back of my head and kick me in the butt,,,,
    they all laugh ,,, for me its starting to feel annoying and painful so i tried to walk away slowly ...



    do you really think their physical joke is funny?
    i try to understand that maybe they just have enough alcohol and they are drunk thats why they are doing it, but to hit me in the back of my head 3x and kick me in the
    butt 2x is not funny its quite painfull.
    It sounds your father-in-law is a maniac or just want to have a feel of your bottom?......joke.

    Well for me it wasn't funny too! If I was you I would tell him not to do it again because it was hurt and try to get drunk next time then do the same way your father-in-law did to you
    Not an expert, I only try to help.


  28. #28
    Respected Member bornatbirth's Avatar
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    if anyone of my family did that to my wife and i laughed to,when we got home i will get kicked and punched by my wife

    whatever your sober husband says,you tell him that should never happen again and until he does tell his dad to stop it,kick him out your bed

    i gather hes been doing it as a joke to you but you find them all laughing at your expense not so funny and im surprised if you already told your husband you dont like it,hes let it carry on....just go and do the same to your mom inlaw
    i have learnt to do what my wife says!


  29. #29
    Respected Member LadyJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
    if anyone of my family did that to my wife and i laughed to,when we got home i will get kicked and punched by my wife

    whatever your sober husband says,you tell him that should never happen again and until he does tell his dad to stop it,kick him out your bed

    i gather hes been doing it as a joke to you but you find them all laughing at your expense not so funny and im surprised if you already told your husband you dont like it,hes let it carry on....just go and do the same to your mom inlaw
    Correct! and also your in-law might do it again next time so from this time be aware
    Not an expert, I only try to help.


  30. #30
    Respected Member whiteraven's Avatar
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    ive never heard anytghing like this before, seems the drink has brought out your inlaws true feelings of superiority out towards you and if your husband thought it was funny then i dont think much of him either


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