More on Jennifer and Michaels marrage problems

[bornatbirth]

Mod your brain is working very very good

[Alan]

Mick - I haven't commented so far - for good reasons as far as I'm concerned.
Your family here on the forum (myself included) is only able to make comments based upon what you have stated with regard to your situation - and put forward their own personal views.

Of course, only YOU know the real truth and the real situation - none of us could come anywhere near to guessing what goes on behind the closed doors of your relationship - and therefore we come down to advising you based upon what has happened to you.

However, a lot of us have experience in matters of the heart as it were, and we have learned to spot 'red flags.'

Mick, if you will allow me, and I sincerely apologise if I am wrong, but I spot a HUGE red flag here! I only hope that I am wrong!!

I - and everyone else on your thread, are looking out for you Mick. I really hope that you know what you are doing.

If I DO turn out to be wrong, then I surrender to your chastisement!

Al.

[darren-b]

He hasn't got much, or any of either now as it stands....

I haven't fully figured the angle, but I am sure he's getting stitched up.

I dearly hope not.

The angle could be fairly simple - here to work for money to send back home. After 2 years or so (if she can last that long) could get permanent residency and then do what she likes.

Like others on here I question her motives, though I really hope I am totally wrong.

[Doc Alan]

I have read everything here but likewise have resisted commenting - for two reasons:- I'm a relative newcomer ; I could also not talk about my own private life to such a degree on a public forum. As far as sex goes, that's a very sensitive topic and I felt unease at the questions regarding your sex life, even if , or perhaps because, they were not all serious, at a time when you have serious issues to resolve. I have no experience of airing matters of the heart on a forum such as this, but I am very grateful for advice given on less emotive topics such as obtaining a fiancee visa. In return I've endeavoured to offer advice on issues such as smoking and health. When I was at work people were always interested in my lovelife, I guess that's human nature, but I felt distinctly uneasy, as here, when the questioning became to my mind too personal. Of course you have my support, everyone on the forum has an interest in UK-Filipino matters, but feel free to limit what you say to your own "comfort zone".

[joebloggs]

The angle could be fairly simple - here to work for money to send back home. After 2 years or so (if she can last that long) could get permanent residency and then do what she likes.

Like others on here I question her motives, though I really hope I am totally wrong.

well all he has to do is not sign her ILR app and apply for FLR instead, stating she has not passed the life in uk test, so she will probably be given a further 2 yrs FLR. it gives them a further 2yrs to see how they get on or dont get on

[darren-b]

well all he has to do is not sign her ILR app and apply for FLR instead, stating she has not passed the life in uk test, so she will probably be given a further 2 yrs FLR. it gives them a further 2yrs to see how they get on or dont get on

FLR/ILR won't exist by then, but I guess they will be a similar option...

But if things are going well (or a least look to be going well..) after two years, suggesting a further probationary period might cause a bit of an arguement

[joebloggs]

FLR/ILR won't exist by then, but I guess they will be a similar option...

But if things are going well (or a least look to be going well..) after two years, suggesting a further probationary period might cause a bit of an arguement

well if he has his doubts and if she thinks she can automatically get ILR in 18 months or whatever,she's wrong, as he's still holding all the cards and it's up to him whether she can stay here or not

[IainBusby]

I have read everything here but likewise have resisted commenting - for two reasons:- I'm a relative newcomer ; I could also not talk about my own private life to such a degree on a public forum. As far as sex goes, that's a very sensitive topic and I felt unease at the questions regarding your sex life, even if , or perhaps because, they were not all serious, at a time when you have serious issues to resolve. I have no experience of airing matters of the heart on a forum such as this, but I am very grateful for advice given on less emotive topics such as obtaining a fiancee visa. In return I've endeavoured to offer advice on issues such as smoking and health. When I was at work people were always interested in my lovelife, I guess that's human nature, but I felt distinctly uneasy, as here, when the questioning became to my mind too personal. Of course you have my support, everyone on the forum has an interest in UK-Filipino matters, but feel free to limit what you say to your own "comfort zone".

I'm sure that most members on here are only interested in this aspect of the relationship because Mick already said that, prior to her leaving and returning to Phils, they didn't have a sex lif, which for a couple in the early stages of marriage is highly unusual.

If I remember correctly, Mick also said that since their marriage they had in fact, only had sex once and in asking these questions, I'm sure that most of the forum members were just looking for reassuring signs that her motives for returning are genuine.

Iain.

[Doc Alan]

Hi all,


I am really not comfotable talking about our (lack of) sex life

That's why I made my contribution.

[fred]

Mick..I think that the money subject is the most important one whilst you give your dear wife the benefit of the doubt..If I were you I would make it perfectly clear to her that charity starts and ends at home for the foreseeable future..When we visit and live in the Philippines we are asked to respect and understand the local culture....I think it only right that they do the same when they are immersed in ours.
Your situation is a difficult one as any marriage partnership is useless without trust...
One thing to remember..If she has Filipino friends in the UK they will know far more about the situation than you so please do not feel bad about airing your concerns to your friends on this forum ..
I hope that you manage to work everything out..Good luck Mick.
Regards,

Fred.

Hi Fred.
We have not sent any money as yet since she returned, there will be some I am sure.
She does not work yet, we have applied for a National Insurance number, but they send a pack, then call her for an interview.

Does anyone know if some employers might let her start work before she has a Number?

She would if possible like to be a "carer" in a nursing home.
Thanks Mick.

[September]

Dont laugh, I am serious ...ahh sometimes love is blind

[socool007]

When she gets job offer she will get NI no quick ,stay cool dude

[RickyR]

Oh gosh, I'm sorry to hear about this. I hope everything works out for you in the future