Filipino ladies sulk ??

[gm47]

Hi....pardon the title........but I've read many sites and many reports from posters on forums that generally speaking Filipino ladies sulk to get their own way....is this a myth or is it true ? I personally like to communicate with a partner and sulking has never been part of my life therefore if sulking is a general trait of Filipinos then I best not get involved.

What is your experience ? Please note I did use the word "generally" not "all".

[Admin]

I know over 100 and haven't met one that 'sulks'. Their personallity is way better than any Westerners, as they have a much stronger family community than we do.

If you treat them like a git, then like anyone, they'll get piddled off with you.

One of the problems people in the West have, especially the online mariage buyers, they think they are ordering some kind of bush bitch slave, when in truth the Filipino's are on average more highly educated than we are, and when the person realises this they are the one's who feel dumb, and so get defensive. That is were the problems start.

I've been with my wife 6 years, and never had an argument, although I can't hold a serious conversation for longer than 30 seconds!! ;D

Of course we do annoy each other now and again, but as we are together 24/7 that's normal for anyone.

They are human like everyone else, they have as many varied personalities as everyone else. It's all down to the chemistry between you.....like everyone else on this planet.

[gm47]

Hi Keith.....thanks for that informative reply......I wasn't making any judgements.....I just wondered why so many sites mention the "sulk" of the ladies.

I'm happy to hear that your relationship is so healthy and of course if someone treats another human as you described it would be understandable for that person to get a little tetchy !

"they think they are ordering some kind of bush pregnant dog slave,"

Do people like that still exist ????

[Admin]

Sure do, take a peak at the type of people who use Mail Order bride sites! :-/

The Filipino pays the agency, the man pays the agency, they pair you up, arrange the wedding, and then you meet for a day before you marry. So no one know's whoi is what!! ??? Sad way of finding a soul mate if you ask me.

All of the Filipinos I know who had an online relationship were emailing, txting, writing, phoning each other for around 3 months before they met.

MOB arrangements are nothing but blind dates, and would you arrange to marry a blind date before you met them!!! ::)

The media only pisk up on the bad things, but with 70,000+ Filipino's in the UK, I bet the divorce rate is less than the general population.

[ginapeterb]

Regarding Filipinas and sulking

I agree with Keith.....dont meet rhough mail order bride sites......spend some time getting to know the lady........it is best in the end......see if you are compatible........you dont want to find that out when you are married.

Sulking

Nope I have lived with my lady for 6 weeks in close proxmity although not 6 years.....I cant remember ever having an argument with her........it just doesnt happen..........although we laugh about tampo........I havent seen it as yet.......maybe their is a first time for everything ! you get on so well with them and have a good laugh at the cultural differences like her accent.......that she always tells me to Shad up ! but we laugh it off all the time.......they are good fun to be with and its best to spend time together and get to know one another.........Gina says I slam doors in the hotel rooms...............I notice she shouts "Hon" when she wants me short for Honey.....then I have to wait 30 minutes for her question !!! its like you are in suspended animation ! but thats why you like her isnt it ? as to sulking nope havent seen it yet.

[love8888]

Originally posted by ginapeterb@Jul 21 2004, 11:00 AM
Regarding Filipinas and sulking

I agree with Keith.....dont meet rhough mail order bride sites......spend some time getting to know the lady........it is best in the end......see if you are compatible........you dont want to find that out when you are married.

Sulking

Nope I have lived with my lady for 6 weeks in close proxmity although not 6 years.....I cant remember ever having an argument with her........it just doesnt happen..........although we laugh about tampo........I havent seen it as yet.......maybe their is a first time for everything ! you get on so well with them and have a good laugh at the cultural differences like her accent.......that she always tells me to Shad up ! but we laugh it off all the time.......they are good fun to be with and its best to spend time together and get to know one another.........Gina says I slam doors in the hotel rooms...............I notice she shouts "Hon" when she wants me short for Honey.....then I have to wait 30 minutes for her question !!! its like you are in suspended animation ! but thats why you like her isnt it ? as to sulking nope havent seen it yet.

Quoted post





Yes, it's very true of what Keith and Pete said you have to spend more time,honestly filipina dream always to have a happy perfect marriage even we live in a small house and serve our husband,yes we have tampo like Pete said but we are so malambing,we hate quarrels.We love to serve our husband to cook his food, press his clothes,tidy up the house and helping our husband to earn money, we are very independent type in making decission and in everything,we are so sensitive but very understanding too, and we are the one who feel hurt when somebody saying bad words to our husband. We do love so much our husband but if you don't care a filipina and ignore us then we will then plan to leave you BUT still we will think and balance everything and think what would be the out come if we do this .WE always think in advance for the result and always rememeber that there is no divorce in our country that you,ve like here in your country.Hope this will give you an additional idea of what type filipina is.

[Admin]

We love to serve our husband to cook his food, press his clothes,tidy up the house and helping our husband to earn money,
You don't have a spare twin lying around do you? :lol:

[ginapeterb]

Originally posted by admin@Dec 22 2005, 10:14 AM
You don't have a spare twin lying around do you? :lol:

Quoted post



Elsa made a very good post...now we now who love888 is hehehe, we know its Elsa, good points there, my Gina does all that and more...she does..take care of me...press clothes..cook food, look after hubby help him make money, yes..all of that and more...a Filipina is looking always for the happy love story, di ba ? she doesnt have to ber rich to be contented, it takes alot for a Filipina to be unhappy...so well said Elsa..

[Admin]

....my Gina does all that and more....
Please telll!!!! :D :lol:

[ginapeterb]

Originally posted by admin@Dec 22 2005, 07:48 PM
Please telll!!!! :D :lol:

Quoted post


Well to quote my Aunt in Manila...she provides not just day services, but also those services that are associated with the night.....(her words not mine)


Pete

[deepete]

putting the cat out, emptying the jerry

[Pauldo]

Originally posted by gm47@Jul 7 2004, 02:12 PM
Hi....pardon the title........but I've read many sites and many reports from posters on forums that generally speaking Filipino ladies sulk to get their own way....is this a myth or is it true ? I personally like to communicate with a partner and sulking has never been part of my life therefore if sulking is a general trait of Filipinos then I best not get involved.

What is your experience ? Please note I did use the word "generally" not "all".

Quoted post

I think the sulking thing 'tampo' is reserved for soft-touch foreign husbands who let them get away with their spoilt little game. There was a big discussion on one of the more 'rough edged' Angeles city forums a couple of years ago, and several guys admitted their girls would basically refuse to speak to them or doing any housework, or give any of 'that' for days if they got a 'tampo' on.

I hung a bunch of $hit on those guys telling them it was all because they were acting so soft, traipsing round after their little 'honey ko' like lap dogs, saying yes dear, no dear. We've all seen it; sad little obnoxious (ex?) bar girl treating her latest 'flame' like a slave, whilst the guy just sits there with a sickly grin on his face pretending he is happy with it all :huh:

[love8888]

Originally posted by ginapeterb@Dec 22 2005, 06:17 PM
Filipina is looking always for the happy love story, di ba ? she doesnt have to ber rich to be contented

Quoted post




Thanks Pete... I just want to add that when we got married we love so much our hubby more than our selves but of course we must love ourself too cause nobody can love other unless we don't love ourselves ;) and we expect he will do that as well, we really loves a happy ending always. kahit walang ulam bastat magkapiling lagi :D :D :D and no quarrels at all B) we wanted to have a strong family like we have in our country.



The real beauty of any woman is not seen in appearance but found through the innerself of his heart.


For me being contentment is what makes us happy :)


I wish Gina will come back soon as you know it's too cold in here and in the night human heating is the best rather than the radiator he he he :D :D :D

[ginapeterb]

kahit walang ulam bastat magkapiling lagi

Yes Elsa, I agree with the above, that is true. also kahit walang champero ko ang maligaya, bastat mahal ako !

Would you not agree with that also Elsa,

Come on you lazy lot. learn the language, there is no Gina helping me here, you lot simply have to learn to speak Tagalog to a basic degree, start speaking it in the house, even if you just say...

Na ! at the end of every sentence, or Magandayon ! or Maganda ka...at least you are trying...hehehehe

[Philip]

Originally posted by ginapeterb@Dec 30 2005, 05:26 PM

Come on you lazy lot. learn the language, there is no Gina helping me here, you lot simply have to learn to speak Tagalog to a basic degree, start speaking it in the house, even if you just say...

Na ! at the end of every sentence, or Magandayon ! or Maganda ka...at least you are trying...hehehehe

Quoted post


oo, talaga, erm, ummm... paalam.

:D :unsure:

[Pauldo]

Originally posted by manila bound@Dec 30 2005, 09:08 PM
oo, talaga, erm, ummm... paalam.

:D :unsure:

Quoted post


susu, bugok, talaga, malaki, gusto ko, ayaw, er, er, sinigang, tampo, adobo, poki, butto, puet, ulo, er, walanga pera, er, walang asukal, er, that's about it.

na.

:rolleyes: :D B)




Come on you lazy lot. learn the language, there is no Gina helping me here, you lot simply have to learn to speak Tagalog to a basic degree,
Er, why? na. :unsure:

[ginapeterb]

Originally posted by Pauldo@Dec 30 2005, 09:40 PM
susu, bugok, talaga, malaki, gusto ko, ayaw, er, er, sinigang, tampo, adobo, poki, butto, puet, ulo, er, walanga pera, er, walang asukal, er, that's about it.

na.

:rolleyes: :D B)


Er, why? na. :unsure:

Quoted post



oh well...thats better than nothing di ba ?

[Admin]

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantyssiliogogogoch. Is that good enough? :D

[equaliser]

Tagalog no use to me. My girl comes from Davao and speaks visayan.

I have learnt some. Like "Gihigugma tika" :)

[deepete]

Cha,Kape.....O O , delaware asukal

[Admin]

Blimey, I'll have to get a spelling checker, your English is terrible :lol:

[deepete]

The British way always works! shout loudly and point

[fred]

The other half says that a TAMPO session is caused by a lack of LAMBING from her husband.. Im clueless..

Heres one kano`s alternative take on Tampo..Worth a read IMO.


THERE'S A NAME FOR IT, TAMPO!

Surviving Her Moods, One Kano's Way To Deal With Tampo.

Anyone who has spent any time at all with Filipinas will know about Tampo. Sulking. The silent treatment. Filipina's have it down to an art form that their western sisters may have once boasted, but have since lost the skill as their masculine side came more to the fore! Tampo is so terminally female, so illogical in its logic, yet so cruelly effective most of the time. There are ways to defend against it, even fight back but none are as powerful as Tampo itself! Read on.

Tampo is an accepted mode of behaviour within the Filipino culture. It allows for the offended party to display their hurt and offense without offending anyone else, including whoever offended them in the first place. Clever, don't you think? Coming from a society where it is quite acceptable for someone to run "Amok" and kill as many as they can before being brought down themselves, Tampo is a far less lethal, yet just as effective way of getting your message across. And nobody dies. Yes, women do the tampo, men run amok, you didn't think it would be the other way around did you?

So the gentler sex has this weapon at her disposal that can cut a man dead as quickly as a strike from a Bolo. Not literally, but figuratively. When you are on the receiving end of tampo, you know it! She will not talk to you, harsh punishment from a woman of any nationality as women place more store in communication and conversation than men do. For a Filipina, a person brought up in a culture that places the group above the individual and getting along with everyone in that group more important than personal advancement, not speaking to you is really playing hard ball.

For us foreigner men we might actually enjoy the silence, the hours or days free from nagging or shrew like remarks but this will be short lived. She will tune in and realise that we are actually enjoying the peace and quiet and so she will up the intensity a little. Some physical contact and cold shouldering will come into play. Doors will be subtley slammed, plates crashed down on the table in front of us and other signals will be sent to show that we are being punished and that we should not enjoy the process!

Repeated attempts to get her to explain why she isn't talking to you will be met with silence. After all, she isn't talking to you, remember? If she did give you an answer it wouldn't make sense to your logic restricted male brain. Nor would it necessarily be anything more than a representation of her emotional state, devoid of any tangible connection to anything you have ever said or done, but perhaps things you may have intended, thought or could one day perhaps, maybe, might, possibly do. Like I said, forget logic, reason and trying to make any sense of the situation. Simply accept you did worng, you are being punished and you have a duty to make ammends.

This will entail paying lots of attention to her over considerable periods of time. No matter how much she ignores you, keep at it. It may take days or it may be only hours but slowly she will allow you to do little things for her and she may even speak directly, albeit abruptly, to you. Gradually she will soften further and tehn before you know it she will be the warm, loving asawa of old and you had better warm up and forget the cold time and be ready to go on as if nothing happened! If, like me, you find it difficult to be sexually aroused after a few hours of tampo, then don't be surprised if she goes right back into full blown tampo because you don't love her anymore! You should be girding your loins as the ice melts and be ready to perform, studlike, as a show, proof shall we say of your love, devotion, fidelity, etc etc.

Remember, to a Filipina there is no shame in showing tampo, or being in tampo. In fact the others in the family or barkada will have respect for her because she has a problem and she is dealing with it the right way and without embarrassing herself or anyone else by yelling and screaming. Like what us foreigners usually do!

Does it work the other way? Can a foreinger husband tampo the wife? I guess you can but I really can't see it having the desired effect. It really is a female thing but I really don't agree with the mens' way of showing their displeasure, beating up the wife. The alternative is to grab the Bolo and run amok!. I'll try hiding in my den for an hour or two!