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ginapeterb
13th May 2005, 19:40
Hi Guys,

You have to read this one...

Its from a Canadian guy..on the Asawa Forum..


Hi everyone,

Ok, she has a best friend in Butuan where she lives. "He" is 19 and her best friend ever since she was able to kick him of his Crystal Meth habit 3 years ago through talking to him. She tells me she " loves him" as a friend. I have a problem with my wife saying she loves another man. she is VERY close to him and says she loves him more than her own life. Hmm. I have issues about that? I have seen them myself, to close for my liking I'm afraid. She says she considers him a son, yet she is always with him seems 24/7. He has even stayed at her parents home with her, She swears No sex or anything, just friends. But he has fessed up that he loves her more than friendship. My wife knows this, yet she continues to say she loves him..... to him. The Valentines card she sent him blew me away. I have told her to stop saying these things to him, she says, : its my life in Butuan until I come to canada " I will do as I wish, he is a friend only, that is all. I have a problems with this guy. Iam a guy and I know what he wants. Yes, ok truthfully, my wife is absolutely gorgeous and very well endowed and I know what he wants. I saw his cell phone last Dec. 217 pics of my wife on it. Hmm. what should I do? I have asked, told, faught, the silent treatment, everything, nothing works, she just says, she knew him before I knew her and he is her best friend and she loves him. man..... I cant accept that , hearing those words..........Kills me. What should I do? How can I understand?
Is this normal behaviour for Filipina woman? Should I be concerned? I just about left her several times about this topic. I even said, choose him or me, she replies, c? I have a hard time relating to this? Any words of advice I would appreciate. Yes I trust her, but you know what guys are like, One day she may be weak or a bit drunk, I am very very stressed over this situation. I should go there and deal with him, he keeps telling her he loves her, to her. I consider that, very unappropiate and I have told my wife that and she snubs that saying I'm not a Filipino so I don't understand. I'm ready to go there and deal with this guy myself the Canadian/American way. Oh I know you guys know what I mean I need advice or input or anything because i'm at the end of my rope.
Thanks.



Here is one reply from a forum member.



Hi CB:

I've read past posts from you about this woman months ago. You were having problems with her then, and you're still having problems with her. First of all, let me tell you that your Filipina lady's attitude truly stinks to high heaven! Her attitude truly sucks and as a man, I don't see why you even tolerate it! She does not sound at all like a Filipina who's truly in love with you...period! Telling you things like, "it's her life until she gets to Canada" and other BS like that! She's got a lot of gall, let me tell you! If it were me, her sorry ass would never get to Canada...not on my nickel! That's because I would have dumped her months ago! You need to dump this girl CB! If you're arguing with her now, and she doesn't listen or is non-cooperative with you, how is she going to behave once she gets to Canada as your wife?

And don't even get me started about this Pinoy guy she's hanging out with, sending him cards, telling you she "loves" him, etc. And you're wanting to go there tp beat him up? Do that and you may find yourself in Filipino jail, or worse yet...dead! If anything, it's your lady who really needs her ass kicked...kicked right out of the freaking door! I don't think any decent, respectful Filipina would behave in this way. Get some gonads between your legs CB, and dump this "trick"once and for all! She's worthless as a Filipina and will only give you problems and hurt you down the road. Why are you hanging on to her so dearly? Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something? You don't have to immigrate Filipina troubles CB, even if you are married to her. Divorce her while she's still there, then later seek and find a decent Filipina who'll respect you as a potential husband. There are plenty of other decent Filipinas out there who'll love and respect you as a man and as your wife. Find one!

Sincerely,

Herb


Here is my reply



Hi CB....

I Had to reply to you on this one..whilst reading what everyone has said...it makes me mad to read it...and Doc Hayes advice is sound and clear...and I agree with it.

My wife has a male freind...but he is in the Middle East working...I have met him...he is no threat to me...hahahah..he is a typical educated filipino..and is harmless.

I had a long discussion with her about him..to ensure that he is just a freind..and not a sexual freind..if you get my drift.

As for your wife..having a freindship..and the words "I love him" are used..that is unnaceptable, and innapropriate behaviour for a fine Filipina wife, who is Mahinhin...she knows it..as well.

All her freinds know that..and certainly her family knows it, this only leads to one thing...disaster.

As for going over to stick one on him..I can understand you wanting to do that..if it was me...I would love him to be in my country..I have heard these days..that intensive care is not what it used to be in socialized mediicine.

Some of the ladies on the Forum are quite right to disuade you from going over to the Phils and giving him some hospital treatment, as you may not get in again, I think reading between the lines..your marriage is in big trouble buddy, and when she says, "its my life until i get to Canada", thats an incredible statement to make..its not her llife..now she has a husband..and her life is joined to yours..what the hell is this girl playing at ?? I find the whole story incredible.

As Doc Hayes says, its time to put it on the line...I wouldnt give her an ultimatum...that only backs her into a corner..my advice is this buddy.

1. Are you sending her monthly financial support ?? if so..suspend it, see what happens then.

if she moans or complains...tell her its because you find her behaviour unnacceptable.

2. Remind her..that in your culture..her behaviour is grounds for divorce.

And as for this Filipino having photos of your wife on his cellphone...? that is unbeleivable.


Just one point..I had another female filipina freind, who I got close to in another city, I really enjoyed chatting to her, I told my wife about her..and one day she called me in the city where I was, within that same day...my wife called me to discuss it...she told me in Philippine society, it is not appropriate for a man to have another Filipina freind...and I havent told this one I love her ...got the picture..she also told me..that if I continued to have this freindship..I would put the marriage in jeopardy..I listened to her carefully..and apologized..as I did not know that she felt that way..only when she explained it to me..did I tel her..that I will speak to the other lady..and explain how she felt about it..the other lady understood and said..your wife is right to be concerned..I would be too..so maybe its best if I send goodwill messages through the both of you..and leave it at that.

After that..i have not had any dealings..with the other freind on account of my wifes feelings.

So if this man had any scruples about how you felt..he would drop his freindship with your wife immedeatly..but he has not has he ? also your wife..would drop it as well...she hasnt done so..I think the point has been made CB.

So ! STOP THIS SITUATION BUDDY AND STOP IT NOW


and this one....


Quote:
Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something?





HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH

Way to go buddy !!!!!!



Thought you would all laugh at this one.


Pete

Admin
14th May 2005, 04:20
As pointed out, plenty of choice. I keep telling my wife that to keep her on her toes :D

Never been to that forum, short on time, but I'd tell the guy to hire a private detective out there for a couple of weeks to follow them. It'll be worth the money to put his mind at rest, and if she is doing something, divorce is much easier & cheaper with proof.

ginapeterb
17th May 2005, 21:49
Actually Keith I heard that the Asawa Forum has contacts in the Philippines, some American Guy runs a detective agency, to find bad Filipina's on behalf of interested U.S. UK European Boyfreinds, aparrently, he goes out there with a video camera, and needs 3 guys to contribute to his ticket, so he splits his ticket 3 ways, its a cheap way of him getting out there, he goes to his girls place in Cebu, then gets the addresses of the girls, and goes, and spends, a few hours, with the girl, interviews her, videos her house and where she lives, and if he finds any foul play, he reports it to the guy back home if he suspects anything.

Sounds like a good idea, at least then you can dump her, if she is a rogue one and start communicating with a.n. other.

grahamw48
6th July 2005, 23:46
Virtually 100% certain she's cheating.

Happened to me too, and that was after 12 years marriage.

Admin
7th July 2005, 09:39
I can look at as many men as I want without upsetting the wife, just a pity I prefer women :lol:

love8888
16th July 2005, 22:33
Originally posted by admin@Jul 7 2005, 08:39 AM
I can look at as many men as I want without upsetting the wife, just a pity I prefer women :lol:

Quoted post



Hi,


I wish all woman can read this forum as I found it not fair,once there relationship failed man blame to thier girlfriend or their wife,as far I am concerned I think It's both got mistake or might more on the man.What I observe man like to be pretend they are so nice and didn't made mistake :angry: Common be fair ;) Always remember that man is a great pretender :rolleyes:

Admin
17th July 2005, 09:35
God made man first, and woman out of what was left :lol:

Equal rights I say. I'm EQUAL to the task, and she has no RIGHTS :lol:

Joey
18th July 2005, 04:19
Originally posted by love8888@Jul 16 2005, 05:33 PM
... It's both got mistake or might more on the man. What I observe man like to be pretend they are so nice and didn't made mistake :angry: Common be fair ;) Always remember that man is a great pretender :rolleyes:

Quoted post


I gotta admit. You're right. I did mess up. I have been apologising for over a decade. Now I have two daughters who are all messed up because she does to them what she does to me, and it took filing for divorce to get her to almost try to see what is really going on. She still prefers to believe I'm plotting against her, for what end, I don't know, rather than believe she could be doing something wrong.

I truly believe that if I had not messed up, things would be very different.

Love8888, please try not to believe that all men are equal and great pretenders and such. So many attempts by me to keep my family together have been thwarted by my wife's beliefs that match your statements. That attitude can be downright destructive. I might have been that man when I was 20, but I'm 36 now. I've grown up. :) Now, instead of chasing women, I'm just chasing plaguerizers. :P

Hugs to you for reminding us that we are screw-ups, and not just women as many posts here may show. :lol:

Back on the subject: I believe there is a 70% chance that this other guy who the wife talks to is her first husband, who has sent her off to get citizenship so she can sponsor him to the current husband's country. Just a thought. :D

love8888
20th July 2005, 22:16
Originally posted by admin@Jul 17 2005, 08:35 AM
God made man first, and woman out of what was left :lol:

Equal rights I say. I'm EQUAL to the task, and she has no RIGHTS :lol:

Quoted post





As far as I know here in your country law both man and woman are equal huh&#33; <_< And God came from the womb of a woman ;)

ginapeterb
21st July 2005, 14:14
Originally posted by love8888@Jul 20 2005, 09:16 PM
As far as I know here in your country law both man and woman are equal huh&#33; <_< And God came from the womb of a woman ;)

Quoted post



Assuming of course..you beleive in the Trinity.

Admin
23rd July 2005, 14:10
Trinity.Isn&#39;t that running in the 3-05 at York? :unsure: