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View Full Version : It's getting too much! - would like some good advice



voxie
26th February 2007, 23:42
Hi all, I need some advice on something you've probably all heard about before. The story goes a little like this...

Basically, last April my mum went to the Phillippines for a month. Then she came back and eventually told me and my brother that she got married to a man named Rebusa over there, and that he will be coming to the UK when all the legal documents have been sorted out. This was a big surprise to me and my brother. We asked about Rebusa, he is about 43, he has got experience working various jobs, working in a farm and as a tailor making clothes. But he doesn't speak English much at all, and he doesn't have any educational qualifications. I told mum that if he were to arrive here in London, it would very hard to teach him English, find a job, as well as work and keep the house at the same time! My mum said she knew this, and is willing to do it still. Me and my brother still didn't fully approve, knowing as we are hard up for money enough as it is. But we sympathise, because my mum divorced my dad 20 years a go, and has been lonely for a very long time. Also, as she gets older and older, and me and my brother become busier and busier with work, we know we won't always be around 24-7. Rebusa sounded like a kind man, and if it will benefit my mum and make her happier, who am I to stop her, right?

Come October, Rebusa arrives in London Heathrow. He seems a nice guy, very shy, quite thin. He hardly speaks at all - I put this down to him being shy and not knowing how to speak English. He is pretty much a stranger in the house, but he's so quiet, we sometimes forget he's even there! He doesn't intrude on anyone, and likes to watch TV or eat dinner with us sometimes.

It's now February 2007, and he is getting depressed. He is doing English lessons every week, but the financial status in the house isn't very good. We need more money coming in.

Does anyone know anywhere in London that could help train Rebusa with English and work at the same time? The work doesn't necessarily have to be paid work for now, he is willing to work voluntarily.

Any help would be appreciated. I am in the middle of sorting my own job now, so it has been difficult. In fact, even my mum is looking for work because apparently her current company is doing a cut! Geez. lol :Erm:

Hope the story didn't bore you too much!

Help appreciated!


Rhoda.

tiger@tigress
27th February 2007, 02:38
Hello Roxie,

English language is very easy to learn all you guys have to do is spend time talking to him.. i know he knows few cuz English is beeing thought in elementary and commonly use here in Philippines... The only problem is most of us are intimidated to speak and we are afriad to be corrected...

eljean
27th February 2007, 15:29
so how did rebusa and your mom get to know each other if he doesnt know how to speak english that much?so is it just love at first sight?:D anyway....i was just wondering as you say so that he doesnt speak so much of english knowing your mom and him got married i was thinking about how they share feelings well if your mom speak philippine language like rebusa has then its not wonder but if your mom doesnt know then....i will always wonder how?:Erm: the only person that can help him would be his wife your mom...
again it will be hard again for your mom to interpret or teach him because it is how it should be i think rebusa is just being quite and observant around trying to adjust into a new world...his 43 so thats a long adjustment to him...
the weather, specially the language...the best advice would be is to buy him book, a dictionary one like english-or whatever language has rebusa has and also a help mostly from his wife...tyr to speak to him as often sure he will try to speak too you too...i know ther are some people also that really doesnt know how to speak english at all but eventually they learn to speak it somehow...but it will always take time.....i hope i give a little help in here for you....:)

baboyako
27th February 2007, 19:16
balut vendor?

all he needs is a bell & a bicycle :xxgrinning--00xx3:

yummy
28th February 2007, 16:25
Hi all, I need some advice on something you've

Rhoda.

the CENTER FOR FILIPINOS maybe can help...

[No Links without Permission]

fred
1st March 2007, 09:10
This is a very unusual story!!
A probable reason that he is depressed is that he cannot find the streets paved with gold or the famous Kano money tree anywhere.
He would have promised his family that their financial troubles are over and that he would send financial support as soon as he could and there after on a regular basis..
His depression will also be attributed to culture shock..
He probably is also pining for his Carabao and rice crop!!
Good luck to you and your Mum though..Im sure he will adjust in time.