My wife wants me to leave our home.

[lordna]

Just been catching up on this and read your post #229. This thread seemed so sad i almost couldn't bear to read it previously. However, have now just read your good news and seen the pictures of your two great looking boys and just thought i would add my congratulations on what must have been extremly difficult period for you. Glad things are now starting to work out.

[gWaPito]

Just been catching up on this and read your post #229. This thread seemed so sad i almost couldn't bear to read it previously. However, have now just read your good news and seen the pictures of your two great looking boys and just thought i would add my congratulations on what must have been extremly difficult period for you. Glad things are now starting to work out.

Thank you lordna

I appreciate the time you spent writing this

I read back and cringe at a lot of the stuff I wrote. ..always shoot from the hip, me I can't change who I am.

I said earlier I'll be posting pictures of the 4 of us before all this happened. I will when I get home

You can't take away happy memories, which were plenty.

[gWaPito]

This still all so difficult for me. I love my boys with all my being ..I see so much of Jane in them both so I can't bring myself to dislike Jane like i did because the boys are Jane. .I hope this is making sense to somebody. .It isn't to me ...even after all the hurt inflicted on me I can't feel hatred.

When James sings his Twinkle twinkle little star I hear Jane's voice coming through as well.

How do some divorced separated people hate each other so much yet would give their lives for the children they brought into this world who are essentially the waring parents.
It's beyond me ....you would of thought if both loved their children as much as they do, they would make a way to make thinks right whatever either have done. ..We don't suffer the children! !.....Unfortunately this takes 2 to make this happen.

[bigmarco]

Gorgeous looking boys Mark. I can almost feel your excitement at getting them home for the first time.

[stevewool]

its very hard to really hate someone, at first maybe because you are hurt and the only way is to hurt that person too,
In my story i hated my then partner for what she did to me and at the time it would have been so easy to over step that mark and kill her and myself, thats how it got to me, you have to move on through the hurt and anger and in time it gets better and in a funny way the children do bring you round to thinking what you first had was good at that time but you know now, it would never have lasted, time is the greatest healer for everyone concerned

[marksroomspain]

This still all so difficult for me. I love my boys with all my being ..I see so much of Jane in them both so I can't bring myself to dislike Jane like i did because the boys are Jane. .I hope this is making sense to somebody. .It isn't to me ...even after all the hurt inflicted on me I can't feel hatred.

When James sings his Twinkle twinkle little star I hear Jane's voice coming through as well.

How do some divorced separated people hate each other so much yet would give their lives for the children they brought into this world who are essentially the waring parents.
It's beyond me ....you would of thought if both loved their children as much as they do, they would make a way to make thinks right whatever either have done. ..We don't suffer the children! !.....Unfortunately this takes 2 to make this happen.

Fully understand what your saying Gwaps its that sort of thing when you look at the boys you see her in them but not that hatred of her but the joy of the two little miracles that were born from you both.

That link will always be there and to hate only destroys any happiness that these two little guys deserve.

They are a real credit to you and I only hope things can be amicable in the future for you both.

BTW those pics lol your little boys look like twins absolutely adorable.

All the best buddy for the future your friend Mark...

[Fuzzybear]

I don't quite know whether to advise counselling or a good lawyer to be fare one has to ask what did you do to create such hostility from your wife. I feel such sympathy for the children as they are innocent victims of what is a dysfunctional relationship Sadly it seems your marriage has irretrievably broken down and so The wellbeing of the children must now be the priority of both yourself and your estranged wife

[gWaPito]

I don't quite know whether to advise counselling or a good lawyer to be fare one has to ask what did you do to create such hostility from your wife. I feel such sympathy for the children as they are innocent victims of what is a dysfunctional relationship Sadly it seems your marriage has irretrievably broken down and so The wellbeing of the children must now be the priority of both yourself and your estranged wife

Might I suggest you read the thread from the start...You may pick up a few clues on the way

[gWaPito]

its very hard to really hate someone, at first maybe because you are hurt and the only way is to hurt that person too,
In my story i hated my then partner for what she did to me and at the time it would have been so easy to over step that mark and kill her and myself, thats how it got to me, you have to move on threw the hurt and anger and in time it gets better and in a funny way the children do bring you round to thinking what you first had was good at that time but you know now , it would never have lasted , time is the greatest healer for everyone concerned

You are so right Steve In the early stages you are so full of hate and anger, it seemed all so easy to of over stepped the mark.

Time is healing, just like you said it would from the start of my troubles.

[gWaPito]

Fully understand what your saying Gwaps its that sort of thing when you look at the boys you see her in them but not that hatred of her but the joy of the two little miracles that were born from you both.

That link will always be there and to hate only destroys any happiness that these two little guys deserve.

They are a real credit to you and I only hope things can be amicable in the future for you both.

BTW those pics lol your little boys look like twins absolutely adorable.

All the best buddy for the future your friend Mark...

Since having the boys, Mark..I can't find it within me to hate her...This may seen strange to some...Even on our day in court, while my solicitor and daughter were whooping it up after the judge's verdict, I couldn't ....I could sense Jane was hurt by the outcome, all i felt was sorrow..what the hell do you make of that????....Here was a woman who for the previous 3 months tried to bury me without trace yet, I felt compassion for her at the end....She could of been right, I may of needed my head felt

I'm not getting carried away with this...what happened this weekend doesn't mean it's going to be the same every weekend. What can't be reversed is the boys memory of me any more....no more near 90 day separations!

[stevewool]

I could sense Jane was hurt by the outcome, all i felt was sorrow..what the hell do you make of that????....Here was a woman who for the previous 3 months tried to bury me without trace yet, I felt compassion for her at the end

here proves to all around you that you are a good man, a person with compassion

[SimonH]

here proves to all around you that you are a good man, a person with compassion

My thoughts exactly, very well said

[SimonH]

I don't quite know whether to advise counselling or a good lawyer to be fare one has to ask what did you do to create such hostility from your wife. I feel such sympathy for the children as they are innocent victims of what is a dysfunctional relationship Sadly it seems your marriage has irretrievably broken down and so The wellbeing of the children must now be the priority of both yourself and your estranged wife

That has to be the one of the rudest, most presumptuous responses I've ever read. Just a few points:-
1. Have you taken the time to read the thread before jumping to conclusions?
2. To be fare? Who's paying for what The spelling is fair
3. Dysfunctional relationship? Who the do you think you are stating facts about something you know nothing about.

When you take the time to look up the difference between fare and fair, maybe you should look up the term internet troll at the same time You may find the similarities rather reflecting.

On a different note, it's getting to that festive time of year again soon and I hope you're a lot kinder to the children that come to see you, by the look of your picture you'd make the perfect high street Santa I see you've already invested in the red jumper

[grahamw48]

here proves to all around you that you are a good man, a person with compassion

I agree Steve...and so much better for the children when the parents show respect for one another, even though they're not actually 'together' anymore.

Something I always made sure of where my boy was concerned (and still do).

[gWaPito]

Steve Wool, Simon and Graham...many thanks again!!

I came home last night intending to post past happy pics but I was reminded any one can put in their 4 penneth worth, whether right or wrong, so I decided against it ...not only that, It wouldn't of been right to post another adult's pic without permission

Instead, I told you a lot more about me!!...that wasn't the intention

Simon's got me double checking what I post now Thanks anyway

[SimonH]

Simon's got me double checking what I post now Thanks anyway

No need to check anything I only ever pull people up when they're behaving in a condescending manner, or having a pop at someone else. Especially when the person I was correcting states that he is a freelance jounalist, he really should know better

[Michael Parnham]

No need to check anything I only ever pull people up when they're behaving in a condescending manner, or having a pop at someone else. Especially when the person I was correcting states that he is a freelance jounalist, he really should know better

I agree Simon, good thinking!

[gWaPito]

No need to check anything I only ever pull people up when they're behaving in a condescending manner, or having a pop at someone else. Especially when the person I was correcting states that he is a freelance jounalist, he really should know better

Interesting this When fuzzybear posted what he posted here last night he had no rep. ....Lo and behold, a few hours Later he's got himself a hat full Strange that

[Trefor]

Great looking kids! You're doing the right thing to keep looking after them like this and just 'being'' their Dad. I'm so pleased you managed to get to this stage.

[grahamw48]

Interesting this When fuzzybear posted what he posted here last night he had no rep. ....Low and behold, a few hours Later he's got himself a hat full Strange that

...Even though 'bull in a china shop' came to mind.

[gWaPito]

Great looking kids! You're doing the right thing to keep looking after them like this and just 'being'' their Dad. I'm so pleased you managed to get to this stage.

Thank you Trefor

I never had this relationship with then before. ..They were always kept from me. .even my mum was and still is a stranger to them. ..not to mention their elder brother and sister. .yes, it's a tragedy the marriage has collapsed but at least now the boys will have a considerable more rounded life.

We got this stage sorted hopefully the rest of the stages will go the same way

[fred]

Glad things are on the up Gwaps..
Cheers Fred!!

[SimonH]

Interesting this When fuzzybear posted what he posted here last night he had no rep. ....Lo and behold, a few hours Later he's got himself a hat full Strange that

I must admit I'm a bit confused As of now 5 posts and 5 reps, doesn't make any sense to me, maybe a mod can shed some light on this?

[grahamw48]

I gave him rep for one of his posts.

[fred]

I must admit I'm a bit confused As of now 5 posts and 5 reps, doesn't make any sense to me, maybe a mod can shed some light on this?

Looks like someone forgot to tick the right box..

[SimonH]

Looks like someone forgot to tick the right box..

I thought it was the one on the left I had to tick, silly me

[Ako Si Jamie]

I don't quite know whether to advise counselling or a good lawyer to be fare one has to ask what did you do to create such hostility from your wife. I feel such sympathy for the children as they are innocent victims of what is a dysfunctional relationship Sadly it seems your marriage has irretrievably broken down and so The wellbeing of the children must now be the priority of both yourself and your estranged wife

While it's good to have a new member who voices their opinion and speaks their mind, I think you've jumped the gun on this one.

Speaking from experience, one can do their utmost best for their partner and receive abuse and hostility in return. And myself and gwap aren't the only ones.

You could be the most perfect loving caring individual on the face of the earth but there will always be people out there who will hate you for it. That's the way life goes unfortunately.

Interesting avatar btw.

[gWaPito]

While it's good to have a new member who voices their opinion and speaks their mind, I think you've jumped the gun on this one.

Speaking from experience, one can do their utmost best for their partner and receive abuse and hostility in return. And myself and gwap aren't the only ones.

You could be the most perfect loving caring individual on the face of the earth but there will always be people out there who will hate you for it. That's the way life goes unfortunately.

Interesting avatar btw.

Cheers Jamie. ..your last sentence was a hole in one.

Some may find that hard to understand but, it's true.

Some might ask why didn't I pick up on this at the start well, it wasn't there at the start.

Mission accomplished.

Cheers
Gwaps xx

BTW. ...I got nothing against folks having differing opinions to myself. ..what does nark me is folks not willing to spend the time boning up on the information before them before making their Judgement

Just a thought

[gWaPito]

This was taken Nov 23.2012 @ SM Sucat

[grahamw48]

Oh wow....lovely picture !

You're much better looking than I thought Mark.