My story for Mickcant and others

[baby38]

meet this woman online introduced to me by a friend who meet her online, her name was Hazel Gurro Condeza also known as Pilar Gurro Condeza born 20/11/76 of Punong Gingoog City,I told her when first meet online if you ask for money things will end, she told me she was only interested in love and getting a better life for her son,we used to chat everyday on cam,after about 3 months i decided to go to the phills to meet her.we got on well apart from demands from family for hugh amounts of food.
About 5 months later I went back to the phills to marry her, before the wedding her fathers so called business partner came to see me at the hotel saying her father wanted 150,000 before i married his daughter, i kept saying no this man kept on insisting on it,lucky for me there was another Australian there told this man,just listen i had already told this man i had no money and we don`t marry and give the family money.
The father was the barrangy captain,he even said to me he expected 40,000 peso a month from not bad seeing I was only getting 40,000 peso a month on a disability pension , I told him no.
Any way we got married late October 2006 at the parents house at 5.30 Sunday a civil wedding preformed by a family member who is judge,the wedding ceremony only lasted minutes,there was only suppose to be only 30 people at the wedding,end up 100 plus after the food had been served I had one drink,I woke up 10 hours later with money stolen out of my wallet,right away i knew i was drugged,there was no welcome to the family etc .I agreed to send my wife 5000 pesos a month.
My wife told me she was not interested in a spouse to come to Australia,only a tourist visa.
I went back to Australia it took her 6 months to process the visa,then started asking for more and more money,the visa was refused on the grounds she had applied for visa 12 months before to another Australian and it was also decided by immigration she would not stay with and move on to someone else here in Australia.
I decided to back to the Phills,she was not close to me different family members asking for big sums of money for the dad,this did not stop, I was told by someone all the money i sent my wife was going to her dad,also i found western union receipts getting large amounts of money sent to her by other men,also I managed to get into her yahoo account,she was talking to many men saying she was single wanted a good home for her and her son and asking for money.Also her stomach was larger than time was there before.
I got back to Australia and decided to end things,about 2 weeks later,her sister contacted me saying my wife was pregnant that was funny I only had sex once and was the was the worse sex i had with her,also the way she was looking at a Filipino man all the time he was always there never seen him on other visits,my so called wife told baby due March 18th i was there end of Sept things did not make sense.
I decided to go back end of Jan over the xmas period i did not hear from her for 21 days I finnally got hold of her she told me she was in hospital i asked why her parent not contact me,her reply was her parents did not like me and when i came over i would stay by myself her parent dont want to see me and herself.
I still went over and stayed with a friend in Cebu.
On my way to Brisbane i sent her a text message saying i was admitted to hospital and trip delayed by 2 weeks,it took her 5 days to reply she did not want me there.
On Feb the 5th my ex next door neighbor who married her cousin another sad story contacted saying my wife had a baby daughter and i was not the father and the father was her Filipino seaman husbands so i can now understand why she did not want me there.
i contacted her she told me it was my kid it was white had blue eyes big nose like mine big eyes etc,until this never seen a photo of the baby etc she never mentioned a thing about the baby to,no wonder 5 months from when i was last there she had the baby.
When i got back to Australia I applied for a divorce,she contacted me on yahoo demanding 500,000 pesos to sign paper i kept the conversation gave to my solicitor and got a divorce . Of course i did not pay her any more money after I heard about the baby being born.
Now back on reflection I am certain now I am not the only foreigner this has happened regarding this woman.
My ex friend wife started telling me things about the stopped,the father had made threats to her family her was living on their land but told her 3 year old son
was a kid of an official in city hall doing favors for the father,this woman lied to me many time sold the engagement ring,told me she had no passport but had one.I know i saw the warning signs before i got married,once she left me alone at hotel saying road was flooded,i found it was not,i was at hotel for could not get money out to get food so i went out with out food,another she lied about not being i car when i saw her,just so many other things.
I was even warned by family member who I got on with the family only interested in money not the girl.the father made out they were poor living in poverty,but lived in best house in village expensive furniture cable TV etc the father had a big stomach would put most obese Australian men to shame.
baby38

These are two different occasions a week before the wedding the father business partner came to my hotel demanding 150,000 peso to marry his daughter,
On the other occasion the man from the registration office came to my hotel asking for another 1000 peso for the wedding to go ahead, when i paid the 350 peso i asked the man do i have to pay more money he said no,that was the day before the wedding.
How do you put photos in these forums.
I must admit i felt ashamed being scammed like this but now relieved .

[tomboo]

sad reading young man, if i read it right it seems she was already married? therefore the annulment should have been easy, i hope you reported this and the judge who married you

[RickyR]

oh gosh, sorry to hear about this. Very nasty situation. Internet Dating sites seem to be a hive for these gold digging scammers, and it seems only the lucky manage to find the good ones.
I really hope that our future will hold something better.

[rani]

S I G H

men oh men.. please use your heart and mind as well... there were too many incidents / signs that should made you leave her but you still pursue on the marriage.. i cant blame you coz that's how you love her.. but again, please dont ignore the "gut feel"

we learned from our past experiences (good and bad) but what matters most is that you are HAPPY with your FILIPINA wife now...

congrats

[baby38]

The trouble is trying to get her already married name, its so easy to get a new birth ceriticate, a new idenity, I contacted the Nso no body seemed to be interested, i have now heard of other simalar situations where wife not interested comming to mans country delays of getting visa as long as money comming monthly.once stopped they move on to the next person.

[baby38]

WHEN I LOOK BACK NOW,THERE WAS HEAPS OF WARNING SIGNS,tHE LAST I WAS THERE FOUND ALL THESE WESTERN UN ION RECIEPTS GETTING HEAPS OF MONEY FROM OTHER FORIEGNERS,i EVEN MANAGERED TO GET INTO HER YAHOO ACCOUNT TALKING TO MANY MEN SAYING HOW SHE WANTED TO HAVE A MAN TO LOOK AFTER HER AND HER SON,THE FEELING i HAD SHE DONE THIS MANY TIMES BEFORE.

[ghee101]

pardon me but i have to do this...


!@#$#%#$%^#$!@$#%% sometimes i hate my own fellow pinays (and their families)!!!

[rani]

pardon me but i have to do this...


!@#$#%#$%^#$!@$#%% sometimes i hate my own fellow pinays (and their families)!!!

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[RickyR]

The problem is, sometimes you just want to trust someone, and you it doesn't matter how many signs are given to you, you just want to believe that everything will be perfect and that your girlfriend is different. Sometimes the heart is too strong, and for women that prey on people like this is awful.

This website is about Thailand, but the general idea of cultural differences can be taken onboard from it. This is well worth a read, and some of the stories in here, I know have happened to Westerners in the Philippines. http://www.conanstevens.com/temp/private_dancer.pdf

[bornatbirth]

its easy to read the signs, a filipina will want to be with you all the time and the family should be embarassed to ask for anything, then again these ladies are pretty good at what they do!

[malditako]

this girl needs a

[ghee101]

its easy to read the signs, a filipina will want to be with you all the time and the family should be embarassed to ask for anything, then again these ladies are pretty good at what they do!

exactly! my family got pride up to their necks and noses. that wont happen here.

this girl needs a

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

yes girls!! and not only that pinay but the rest of her family. im guessing the judge is fake too.

[triple5]

What a disgrace. What gets me is these parents who encourage their daughters to do it No shame

[Pete/London]

Well I am not so understanding, you are 64 according to your data, what has life taught you?
Also, the Philippines is full of genuine attractive ladies who have not been round the block and have children in tow, why dont you take your time and if anything happens you dont like, move on.
I am constantly reading on here of men who meet people on line and after a short space of time then start paying their girlfriends
an allowance, why? If I started going out with a girl here in England I dont pay them an allowance so why do they need it. In the circumstances you describe you probably was lucky to get out of the situation in 1 piece, lesson learnt the hard way.

[cessxy]

Whatta Shame. Sorry to hear that. I dont think that you are the only one , the way that they are asking money from you It looks like they have done this before. Anyway just move on theres a lot of honest ladies around there.

[stevewool]

its a learning curb my friend, you are here now with many new friends men and ladies and boss keith and a person called ash hes well hes differant ,most have been burnt before and some are very lucky too have found there partner too, always ask questions and then more questions about who they are and there family too, i hope you never give up there are some very very nice people out there , just make sure your eyes are open and theres no rush too, good luck

[sars_notd_virus]

this is a good read and a bit of warning for some foreigners out there


thanks for sharing your story baby38.....lessons learned!! at least you found urself a nice,decent filipina wifey in the end and u are happy!!!

[mindanao]

i am sad reading the story of baby38. You can only trust yourself.

[Terpe]

I totally understand and agree with the comments from RickyR
When you are.. In Love.. you want to trust that person.
Love is blind. [often times true].
Some people are naturally trusting and some people are naturally suspicious.

We are viewing the story objectively and with some hindsight.
baby38 had so much going on in a short time.

I found it such a sad and heart-rending story.
I can really imagine the anguish and distress.

My only (younger) brother was totally scammed by a Danish woman
whilst he was living in Spain. He lost everything and never got over it.
Turned to alcohol and drugs and passed away 2007

As Pete/London said he was probably lucky to get out in one piece.

[baby38]

you are right,many have said i was lucky to get out alive,but all good meet a descent hard working educated Filipino, respected by all my friends,all her friends are hard working,and all have respect for me,and my wife does not pressure me to send money back home,and my wife my best friend.

[mickcant]

Hi baby38,
Thanks for posting your events!
I also agree that when we love saomone perhaps we are looking for the good points in a person we want as our partner and ignoring things that we should pick up on, I can see a lot of that in my case.
I am just going out but will reply more later
Mick.