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  1. #1
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    Keep someone in your thoughts!

    Hi to you all,

    You probably haven't noticed but I have been a little quiet recently! As a few of you know I am currently in Cebu with Connie. We arrived last October with a planned return next month. Our purpose was to miss the British winter (sounds like a wise move) and to watch the construction of our lovely new home which is now going on in Minglanilla 15 Kms to the south of the city. A few months before we left we heard from one of our favourite nieces, Lalie, in one of her regular conversations with Connie, that she was suffering bad headaches. She then started having siezures and was taken into hospital in Ozamis, Mindanau. CT scans revealed a swelling in her brain, which was diagnosed as an infection which was operated upon, drained and treated by anti biotics. A biopsy was done which we were relieved to learn showed no sign of any tumour. She remained in hospital for many weeks, being watched by her 15 year old sister Fatima. Lalie is just 19 herself. They have an older sister, Malyn who is 22 and being supported through nursing college by us. However their Mum has not seen any of them since Fatima was born, because of a family breakup, and they have been brought up by their father. For all of 2007/8 their father was very sick, with what seemed like either lung cancer or TB, but was never properly diagnosed. Lalie cared for him until she went into hospital and, just after her operation, he died, leaving the girls efectively without parents and Malyn head of the family. There are some Uncles and Aunties around but they all have their own problems. Lalie was not told of her father's death until a week or two had passed and had to miss his funeral.
    We decided to bring Lalie to Cebu to help her recovery. Connie went to Ozamis, sorted out all the remaining bills, spoke with the doctors and brought her here. We registered her with a neurologist at the local hospital and for a few weeks all seemed OK. She had the occasional little siezure but we were assured it was normal. She was on a cocktail of anti convulsive drugs plus steriods etc. Then the seizures got worse and she was taken back into hospital before Christmas, the drug levels increased and the biopsy samples rechecked both in Cebu and by a specialist in Manila. Again nothing serious could be traced but the doctors were clearly becoming increasingly concerned that her new CT and MRI scans were still showing lesions in her brain, and that maybe the sample taken was not truly representative. 10 days ago she underwent a second operation in the Perpetual Succour Hospital in Cebu City and a biopsy analysis has revealed a Grade 3 tumour.
    Lalie starts a course of radiotherapy tomorrow which will go on everyday for 6weeks. She remains on a heavy dose of drugs, which are controlling the seizures but have some side effects too. She gets very tired. Her treatment will not cure her, but should slow down its progression and enable her to enjoy her life to the full.
    Lalie in some ways is lucky as I am able to support her treatment which, as I am sure you can appreciate, costs a considerable sum of money here in the Philippines. I feel for those patients I am seeing who are offered help, but have to decline because they cannot afford it.
    This has not been a good trip for several reasons, Lalie's situation obviously being the most important. Just to complete my tale of woe though let me tell you what has happened back at home. We rented our UK house, via an agent, to a nice retired couple for the period we were away. I wanted to do this more for the security of having someone living there and not leaving it empty as during weekends and evenings it is a little isolated. All was going well, no real problems, until we received advice that the Police and an ambulance were in attendance at our home. Later we learned that the wife had a history of depression and had hung herself! Now the husband has moved out, leaving the place unoccupied, not that I blame him, and neither of us are looking forward to going back now.
    Thanks for listening and please keep Lalie in your thoughts in the coming weeks.


  2. #2
    Respected Member jimeve's Avatar
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    David, hope Lalie has a quick and full recovery, must have been a very distressing time for you and wife.

    Jim.


  3. #3
    Respected Member Eljohno's Avatar
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    David i will be praying for her!!


  4. #4
    Respected Member mavid's Avatar
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    My prayers goes with you and your family.


  5. #5
    Respected Member Ann07's Avatar
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    We will pray for Lalie's speedy recovery.


  6. #6
    Respected Member DianaKevy's Avatar
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    Hope Lalie will have a full and quick recovery before you guys are coming back. It's not easy to leave someone that is not in good condition.


  7. #7
    Respected Member Pepe n Pilar's Avatar
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    It's really depressing. My prayers to Lalie and to your family. We all have had one time in our lives stories that are really depressing but it's just temporary. In due time you will overcome this situation. God Bless.
    " The people who mean something to your life are not rated "the best" don't have the most money, haven't won the greatest prizes....
    They are the ones who care about you, take care of you, those who, no matter what, stay close by... "


  8. #8
    Respected Member scott&ligaya's Avatar
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    Makes many of our moans here about work, or taxes, or the snow seem completely meaningless... no they are meaningless, I wish you the very best and hope and pray that Lalie gets through the treatment
    Live your life for a reason and don't worry be happy

    if you don't know where you are going then any road will do!!


  9. #9
    Respected Member reginacarlson's Avatar
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    This is depressing, I hope Lalie gets better. The lady that hung herself in your house is shocking and absolutely terrible!


  10. #10
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    We will remember Lalie, and the rest of the family, in our prayers.


  11. #11
    Respected Member dyannesky's Avatar
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    I will include her in my prayers before I go to sleep and everyday of course , be strong...


  12. #12
    Respected Member kimmi's Avatar
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    hi David,

    Lalie is very lucky to have u and Connie.. I understand how hard it is with regards to seizures because my youngest brother also had it since he was a wee boy, is she also taking Phenobarbital?

    My thoughts and prayers are with Lalie and the rest of the family..GOD Bless..


  13. #13
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    I pray for Lalie's speedy recovery.
    It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good to check up once in a while to make sure you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.


  14. #14
    Respected Member girl england's Avatar
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    we will include lalie and the rest of there family in my prayer's
    godbless u all


  15. #15
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    Hi All

    Thanks for all the kind words and prayers. Lalie has had her first treatment without any side effects, so far. She will lose her hair in time and maybe her memory will worsen. Yes Kimmi, she is on Phenolbarbitol along with a variety of other anti convulsants and a heavy dose of steroids to reduce the swelling, the longer term effects of which can be significant.
    Her prognosis is not good. This type of tumour usually means a life expectancy of between 1 and 2 years, even with this treatment, although the doctor will not speculate as he is a devout catholic who firmly believes such matters rest only with God. A radiotherapist friend tells me of patients still alive after 7 years, but with a poor quality of life. All we can do is make sure that whatever she has left is as fullfilling as possible, so we are making sure every day has some fun in it.
    Yes it will be hard to leave her but we won't do so until after her treatment is concluded when she should enter a more lively phase. We have already put into place her care arrangements, with Connie's immediate family, plus her two sisters.
    I can end with some good news. Her mother, who she has not seen for 15 years, has arrived here and will stay with her indefinitely. The relationship will take time to fully bond again but is already there with the younger sister, Fatima, who was really overcome at meeting her Mum for effectively the first time. Blood truly is thicker than water!

    Keep think of her please. Positive thoughts are something which do bring miracles!

    David


  16. #16
    Respected Member somebody's Avatar
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    My Thoughts are with Laile and all around her. Thankfully she has support of some good people.
    Oh lord why did you make so many clothes and shoe shops


  17. #17
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    Perhaps this is God's way of bringing family healing - we pray that it might not be short-lived.


  18. #18
    Respected Member Peanutz's Avatar
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    Hello Lalie,
    No words can describe how I feel for you. Reading your story has brought me into tears and I can feel the pain and the suffering that you are into. I hope you can overcome all this and I sincerely hope that when you get well you can live your life like you should be living.
    Let me tell you a story.
    The door opened and the room was filled with the smell of cooking coconut milk and sweet rice. I hear the steps coming towards my bed; it was Mina, my younger sister. She has been sent upstairs to wake me up. She is wearing a pink shirt and red pleated skirt. Her smile is contagious; she jumped in my bed and started giggling. I usually get annoyed when people wake me up earlier than my usual time, but her liveliness always put me in a good mood.
    We grew up together, we share everything, we eat in the same plate and we tell silly fantasy stories when we are in bed, until we get tired of repeating the same stories; we fall asleep next to each other, I can feel her breath, I would stare to her closed eyes; figures, far echoes of voices will fill my head and I will finally close my eyes and join her in my dreams. The bond that ties us together is so precious that I would give my life for her. It has no boundaries.
    For twenty years, I have seen her for only 5 times? Maybe less, I can’t remember. We do stay in touch, we talk over the phone, we exchange our presents and we greet each other on special occasions.
    It was early Friday morning of mid September 2008, I received a text message from my sister ‘... Ate, I will undergo an extensive operation. I was diagnosed of colon cancer. Please pray for me. It will be 1’oclock this afternoon. I love you and miss you so much...’ We have been informed later on that she is in between Stage II-III cancer...
    I will never, ever wish anyone to receive this kind of news from a person they deeply love. It is devastating. The pain struck me deep in my heart that I believe I stopped breathing in that instance. I cannot think, I don’t know what to do...my mind is searching for help...I was completely shaken; I sat down on the floor and embraced myself in tears.
    She is 35 years old, with a husband and two children. She just finished her Chemo therapy for 6 weeks, the new medicines avoided her to lose her hair, but the inevitable side effects of these poisons will remain. Mina will undergo radiotherapy everyday for a month this March. My Mom already flew over there since November to be with her and to support her in all the therapy cycle.
    It will be a hard, strenuous battle for her life...She might make it and she might not. Life is not fair...it is not fair to anyone. We cannot give justice to this, but we can only give love to those who are suffering with this illness or any kind of it, we can only give them back their dignity and make every moment of their life more bearable.
    I love you Mina.
    I love you Lalie.


    'We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows'

    R.F.


  19. #19
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    Ohhh so sad stories, David and Peanutz, hoping for their speedy recovery


  20. #20
    Respected Member Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    Ohhh so sad stories, ,David and Peanutz, hoping for their speedy recovery
    Amen!

    Al.
    Pressed rat and warthog closed down their shop!


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